Well, I have checked four stores, purchased one head-cleaner that my camera won't accept, and now finally have ordered what I hope is the right one online. Alas, it may take a week to get here.
It's possible that it's tape 22 that's the main problem, somehow, and not the playhead. I tried tape 23 in there and it seemed to be fine. I'm reluctant to try more tapes out in case there is something wrong with the camera -- don't want to damage the tapes, somehow. The fact that it might be the tape and not the playhead is a little scary -- it's my only copy of the tape. Makes me realize why duping is so important. Cleaning the playhead will be a good thing, regardless.
Fortunately, as tapes go, #22 would be one whose loss would probably not stop the film from being completed. It is mostly that first day of shooting the "frazzled" scene, which we ended up reshooting with different blocking and lighting the next day. The rest of it is the "gay comedian" scene (which is what I was going to edit next), but I have come to dislike this scene, anyway, because it's sort of simple-minded and perhaps cliche -- a display of Bill's "gay-dar." If I can, I might cut it from the film, anyway -- even though I really do like the aesthetic of it: Bill on a couch facing the camera/a TV, replaced by Marissa in the same spot when he leaves, both munching Chinese crackers from a little bowl. It's a cute little moment - except for the writing.
I find that I cringe at a lot of the writing nowadays. I feel that my final script did not do justice to the years of development I did for each character and the issues, prior. I ended up with an over-simplified and heavily expository version because I was so determined to ACT-- by which I do not mean "be an actor," but to move from INaction and wishing and whining to DOING. I was hellbent on Getting it Done because I felt that I had been idle too long, let it go too long in the stewpot -- needed to get it all out on the plate!! What is it all for, after all, if it stays inside you (or your computer)?
In the Gnostic gospel of Thomas, Jesus says: "If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you." Wise, wise words that have intrigued, shamed, inspired and comforted me for 25 years.
The frame of mind I was in at that time in 2002 was sort of bifurcated; it was one part "to do is to grow" and one part "get me into ANYthing that's not grad school!!" The former is not my typical state of mind, really; it's very "J" (for you Myers-Briggs fans), whereas I am usually exceedingly "P." But I was so sick of my own P-ness (as it were, ha ha). Sick of pondering.
I wonder what others of you thought of the script at the time or talked about when I wasn't around. I'd be very interested to hear your impressions.
I remember that one of the things that enabled me to get the words on the page was that I thought that we'd be able to do a more "improv" style, that I would encourage the actors to improve the lines & scenes (one of the best scenes in 'sex, lies & videotape' was developed by the actors in a rehearsal improv, according to Soderbergh's memoir, I knew). As I wrote a clunky line, I'd tell myself not to take too much time to make it perfect, because I was working on a deadline and we'd be able to fix it during production - I'd leave it to the actors, for their individual shaping.
I know that in our first rehearsals I said that I wanted to do this, but then I recall shutting actors down a couple times early in shooting because - coincidentally - the couple lines that they first chose to improv on were actually very specifically crafted. D'oh! After that, I tried several times to get actors to branch out and be looser, but all resisted me because I'd lost (or never earned) their trust, I think. Did I say, D'oh! Only about ... oh, 15%? of the lines were word-specific. Less, maybe (without the script in front of me, it's hard to recall -- probably it was scene by scene, actually, not line by line). But how could they/you know?
I seem to recall with Kevin (?) that he wanted to say something other than "lime rickees," but "Rickee," of course, is the name of the main character in my other screenplay, so I wanted to leave it in. How would he know that?
It was a directing lesson. I'm not sure I learned more than "I don't know how to do that" (direct through improv), but that, in itself, is a valuable piece of knowledge.
So. Any thoughts or memories about the script?
'Til next time,
Rachel
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